Um....yeah...

Lo siento my amigos! I can't believe how long it's been since I've posted. A lot has gone downduring that time. I went back to work! Here's my story...

My mother-in-law watched over Olive as I went back to work...still awaiting the answer on whether or not I could work from home, work part-time from home and the other time at the office, or if I could just work part-time hours at home. They declined all three requests. I then did something they were not expecting. Something that kept me up for days just thinking about. I quit my job! I handed my letter of resignation to the boss and gave him my two week notice. Booyah AT&T! It felt liberating and I was excited to continue to be home with my lil monster. I was on a high from the excitement...but that high lasted 24 hours and then reality set in. Holy shit! I just quit my job. My family will be living off one salary...holy shit! I mean...we've been saving for this...hubby and I knew it was likely to come down to this, but to think about quitting and actually doing it is not the same. Of course, I still stand by my decision because taking care of my lil girl a little longer until she's less fragile is just priceless.

I've been jobless for a week now and I'm lovin' it. It feels good and I think Olive is happy to have me back full-time too. :)

So what's next for me...
I've always dreamt about owning a spa. I've talked about it for over a decade and I think I'm going to look into it further. Once Olive gets a little bigger I may take some courses. It's definitely a new direction...it's exciting and scary at the same time. I just hope I don't fail. I can't fail.

I won't fail!

P.S. Congratu-effin-lations to my very good friends (whom shall remain anonymous until I get their approval to write about them :)) They're pregnant, which was no easy feat to achieve, and I'm dorkishly giddy with joy every time I think of their achievement. Yup yup yup!

We Did It!

On Sunday, my sister and I completed the Danskin Triathlon. This is a HUGE feat for the both of us. My sister has just recently gotten serious about working out for her health and this triathlon is the biggest workout that she has ever done. She finished with a smile and a huge sigh of relief. I’m so proud of you, Vanessa! I knew you can do it.

As for me, this was very important for me to complete. To be able to complete a triathlon only after 3 months of giving birth is a big accomplishment for me. I signed up for this in order to force myself back into my routine of working out. It’s my hobby. It’s my own quiet time. I get to reflect, think and dream while I go for a run. No interruptions. No dialog. Just me and my thoughts and my music. Just writing this makes me want to go for a run right now, but I just had a margarita with my mother-in-law, so I best relax…that’s not to say that I’ve never drank and run before. :)

Decisions, Decisions

Today was my first day back to work. I’ve been pretty anxious for the last several days knowing what the result of my request to work from home part-time would be. The answer is “no”. The answer is also “no” to me working from home full-time. So my options are to either find a nanny to watch Olive from home…and quick! The other option is to quit. I’d love to try to make it work to see if I can even do it, but at the same time it’s hard to imagine someone else taking care of my baby while I’m at work. I’m scared they’ll undo all the work I’ve done with her nap routine or maybe Olive will think we’ve abandoned her. It also feels like work is anticipating my resignation. There’s a big move coming up in the next week and in the plans they have me sitting in a bullpen…with two contractors. :( A girl about to give birth in two weeks will even have her own cube…and she’ll be out for 3 months!…AND I’ve been at the company over 4 years more than she. So it’s crap. Knowing this fact makes me want to show them up and work full-time.

Leave my baby in the hands of someone else and return to work.
Stay at home with her, not get paid and risk having trouble finding a job later on.
I’ve got lots to think about.